"Blimey", "Spiffing", "Wanker" and other useful British terms

For any American who is planning to travel to England in the near future, I have listed some British words with their translations that may be of benefit to you. From cockney accents in London, to Brummies in Birmingham and Geordies in Newcastle.....the variety of dialects found through the UK is vast. 

Blimey: surprise/shock/amazement. May also hear the phrase

            "cor blimey" or "crikey" which have the same meaning.

Spiffing: very good/excellent/splendid.

Wanker: original meaning was "one who wanks" (masturbates). Now

              more commonly used as a form of insult ie. "he's a

              wanker" (dick).

Trump: a fart.

Bill, Old Bill or Bobbie: police.

Cuppa: as in "cup of tea". The british are very particular about their

             tea. Most commonly it is drank black with milk. Don't ask for

             ice-tea, you will get funny looks.

Boot: trunk of a car.

Bonnet: hood of a car.

Shirt Lifter: homosexual.

Lift: an elevator.

Bender: drinking session, as in "going on a bender". Occasionally

             used to describe homosexuals so be careful!

Lorry: a semi-truck.

Cheerio: goodbye. 

Chippie: a fish and chip shop. Fish and Chips are a British

              Institution.Typically you will be served haddock in the north

              and cod in the south. It is probably best to avoid "mushy

              peas" if it is your first fish and chips experience.

Queue: a line. The British are very particular about forming orderly

             queues. Never jump the queue (push in line) as this will

             not be taken well.

Crisps: potato chips. Not to be confused with chips which are french

            fries.

Fag: homosexual or cigarette, so be careful of the context. When

        phrased as "going for a fag" this is referring to a cigarette.

Bin: trashcan.

Plaster: band aid.

Bog or loo: toilet. Very common to hear the phrase "where's the loo?".

Dapper: well spoken, well dressed. Often used in the term "your

              looking very dapper".

Bollocks: testicles. Also used as a term of general surprise. The

               phrase "dog's bollocks" refers to something that is very good

               and the phrase "load of bollocks" means something is

               rubbish. While the term "bollocking" refers to getting told off

               (being in trouble). 

Gaffer: bloke (person) in charge.

Blower: telephone. Often heard as in the phrase "get on the blower".

Bloody: swearing. Most commonly used in the phrase "bloody hell"

             which is an exclamation of surprise or shock.

Cotton Bud: Q tip.

Bog Roll: toilet paper.

Tube: the London Underground.

Kitchen Towel: paper towels.

Bonk/shag: having sex.

Guv'nor: the boss. A term very commonly used by cockneys.

Doddle: something easy, as in "that was a doddle".

Narker: annoyed or grumpy.

Dummy: pacifier.

Boozer: pub.

Gobsmacked: taken aback.

Take-away: take out.

Estate agent: realtor.

Taking the piss/taking the mickey: making fun of someone.

Telly: television.

Number plate: car licence plate.

Brolly: umbrella.

Bugger: an inoffensive insult. When used as in the term "bugger off"

              this is considered more polite and less offensive than "f-off".